Today is Sunday and I could be at work today. I have been off since the last week of July. I feeling very off my rocker. My friend Glen, who I shared some intense years as his partner, is moving out of town this weekend. Back to New Hampshire. I am having a hard time. My toes keep bouncing and my stomach feels tied in knots. I cried with him at his house the other night as we stood in the street. I felt very small, and wanted to wipe the tears away, but they just kept coming.
My HIV meds are all sorted out. I am praying that they do the trick. The doc put my on an additional anti-depressant, and I am not sure if that is driving my anxious feelings today. I am definitely feeling overwhelmed. Answering the phone causes my stomach to tense up. I haven't felt like this since I was coming down off meth.
So what is honest is I have milked this sick call to the bare financial bones and now I am experiencing anxiety about next months financial picture. I have some company stock that I can sell. and I am not goin to go hungry or homeless. I just could use some perspective.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
At times like this, since getting into recovery, I take the advice of many people who I've listened to at meetings.
USE THE PROGRAM, AS SUGGESTED.
Pray, talk to another person in recovery, read the literature, pray some more to know the next right thing. Step 12 tells me to practice these principles in ALL my affairs.
It always works. When I do it.
Thanks for writing about this, Tom.
Post a Comment